Blog #5: Post-Service

     One thing I know for sure is that I will never forget the Ling family and all the wonderful Sundays that I spent with them. The Ling's are such wonderful, caring people and they taught me more than I could ever ask for. On the surface, the visits may have seemed like simple ESL lessons yet they were so much more. When fluent language is not a valid option for communication, it teaches the value of all the other aspects of communication. Until taking this course I had never given much thought about all the details of interpersonal communication, however when given the opportunity to experience intercultural communication first-hand; these details become extremely present and of the utmost importance.
     Some themes I noticed over the course of my visits with the Ling's were various aspects of nonverbal language, the uses of the perception process and a confirmation of the linguistic relativism theory. The main thing that I noticed about nonverbal language is that it is in many ways universal and can convey messages across cultures in ways that verbal language can not. A simple facial expression can emote a powerful message even when words fail. A smile or look of confusion would quickly clear up any misunderstandings of what someone was saying. Seeing the Ling family use the selection, organization, interpretation and negotiation steps of the perception process in many of my visits was really quite unique. I was able to see how a person takes new material, in this case a new language, and attempts to make sense of it in terms of their own realities. Perception varies across cultures as well as across individuals. Ester and Lion did not always make sense of things in the same way but were still able to eventually work out the same concept. I also came to the conclusion that linguistic relativism as opposed to linguistic determinism plays a key role in how people communicate across cultures. Language does predispose us to perceive the world in a particular way, yet it does not set limits on our understanding of the world and of each other. The Ling family was able to laugh at the jokes in the film Finding Nemo in the same manner that  Liz and I did. This alone shows that language is not a barrier but simply just one of many lenses through which we view the world.
         This experience will shape my future interpersonal and intercultural experiences by serving as a positive memory to look back on and be reminded of all the elements to keep in mind when communicating with others. In all aspects of my life this experience will remind me to be mindful of the various backgrounds, perceptions and realities of others. It will remind me to not be ethnocentric and to take into account that how I see the world may be very different than the way others do. I will know that this diversity is a positive thing and that it does not have to be a limitation or barrier to communication. As a Psychology major, I am fascinated by how humans think and  expect to work with people from many different cultures in my future career. I also plan to travel and experience other cultures first hand and so this course has definitely helped prepare me to be a competent intercultural communicator.

Blog #4: Perception is everything

     The last couple of visits to the Ling Family have really gotten me thinking about how culture has the ability to influence an individual's perception of the world. As per usual, with each visit my partner and I worked with the Ling family on a variety of subjects that involve lots of intercultural communication. We again labeled things around the house, filled out practice applications, played around with money, tried out math problems and practiced reading. On our most recent visit we decided to watch a movie with the family. We chose "Finding Nemo" due to the fact that it has a simple storyline, has lots of English language references and of course is just an overall enjoyable film. It was such a great experience to watch this family whose native language is not English, laugh at and appreciate the jokes in the film.  It really displayed the progress they are making in learning not only the English language but also some of the cultural behaviors of those native to the United States. We talked about the film after it was finished and everyone really seemed to enjoy the story. Even when there was confusion about the verbal language in the film, Ester and her husband were able to pick up on the nonverbal cues that advanced the plotline. While many cultural perceptions are language based, it seems that basic emotions are universal.
     Since verbal language can sometimes be difficult with the Ling family as they are still learning conversational English; many nonverbal cues have been used to assist with translating a message. Repeating, substituting, complementing and accenting are the forms I most often observed when communicating with the family. Many things are said over and over again and lots of facial expressions and hand gestures are used to effectively get a thought across.
    I have also observed some varying nonverbal codes that the Ling family use that are sometimes similar or dissimilar to those typically found in the Midwest. For instance I find that the Ling family has a similar relationship to kinesics, paralanguage, haptics and physical appearance as those in the Midwest. They use the same facial expressions as everyone else I know, as well as using the same types of tones to express emotion. However I have noticed that their relationships to chronemics and proxemics seems to differ a bit. They seem to not have as tight a schedule as many Americans do; they are usually in the middle of something when Liz and I arrive even though we show up at the same time every Sunday. I would perceive this as being less future-orientated than many typical Americans. I also noticed that they are very open with proxemics or personal space; they always invite us to sit with them on the floor and have no problem being in such a close space with us. This behavior actually gives off a warm and affectionate attitude and I do believe it is a behavior that many Americans lack.
     I see and perceive the world through a lens, one that is crafted by the English language and various American cultural values and behaviors. As my visits with the Ling family near their end (if only for a while) I have learned that while cultural differences can sometimes seem extreme, there are always similarities to be found. There is always a way to communicate across cultures and the Linguistic Relativism theory holds much more weight than that of the Linguistic Determinism. In future interactions of intercultural communication I will be sure to keep this in mind as I try to see how others perceive the world.

Blog #3: The highlight of my Sunday's

     I have now made several visits to the Ling family at their home in Rock Island and am so happy to say that it really has become a highlight of the day and something I genuinely look forward to each Sunday. I love seeing the faces on the kids as they open the door and quickly get ready for our visit. Each visit so far as been similar to the first, as we work on a variety of skills such as picture flash cards, simple math, counting and identifying money, telling time, labeling things around the house, playing games and reading. With each visit I can see the improvements and can tell that everyone in the family practices on their own as well. The kids especially love the "labeling game" in which Liz and I write words on  sticky notes and have them place it on the proper item in the room. Another activity that has been quite popular is the game "Guess Who" in which one has to describe what a person looks like to another as they attempt to guess the character. This game has been great to get the whole family involved and also it has been good for more relaxed conversational English and not just point and shoot words. Liz and I are very comfortable going over to visit with the Ling's now and it has been a great experience so far.
     I spoke of the language barrier in my previous blog post and while I still notice it as a factor that plays into intercultural communication, I am also noticing a lot more non-verbal behavior that also plays a role. As the family has gotten more comfortable with us, and us with them, all of the nonverbal actions are coming out. Lots of facial expressions have been displayed that often times infer content or understanding, and of course sometimes of confusion. The youngest in the family has even sat on my lap during part of a visit which I think not only shows acceptance of my presence but also of me as a person. He is able to understand more and more of what I say and while he loves to repeat all the English words he hears, he also now shows behaviors that indicate understanding of the language and not just verbal repetition.
    It seems that the Ling family is working towards the acceptance and integration stage of cultural adaption and that they have taken on acculturation as their method of adjusting to living her in the United States. They seem to be eager to learn about our culture and strive in it, yet they also retain many aspects of their native culture. For instance they still speak their native language and still eat many of the foods from their home country. They even offered us some candy from their culture which was a strawberry sucker covered in chili powder.
     I have also seen the family, especially the parents go through the stages of the perception process. They will select a word they do not understand (cupboard for example) and then try to organize it into the scheme of "kitchen items." They will interpret the word as a place to store things and associate it with the cupboards they have in their kitchen, finally they negotiate among each other as they speak about the word together.
     What I learned from these past few visits with the Ling family is really just more about how to be a competent intercultural communicator. I have learned that communicating across cultures, especially those with differing languages takes time and patience. I have learned about the struggles of those who must learn the ways of a new culture and I have also learned how to be of the most assistance I can to lessen those struggles. I have seen how important non-verbal communication is especially when language is not always a sufficient option, and also how key perception is to understanding each other. For future interactions both with the Ling family and others I will be mindful and enthusiastic about communication.

Blog #2: Meeting the Ling Family

     Yesterday as I walked up to the apartment of the the Ling Family I was feeling nervous and didn't have much idea of what to expect of my first visit with this refugee family whom which World Relief had paired me with. Luckily the volunteer coordinator from World Relief, Kelly, was there to put my mind more at ease. So together, along with my partner Liz, the three of us prepared to meet the Lings. We were welcomed into their home effortlessly and exchanged names and greetings. Mr. and Mrs. Ling (Lion Ling and Ester) and their two children Cindy and Ram are quite the lovely family and I am so happy to be working with them. After saying hello to the children, they went off to play and the rest of us sat down on the floor to begin learning together. The first thing we did was go through picture cards and assess the skills the couple had in reading and comprehending English. They have only been in the United States a short time and were doing very well at picking things up. Next we went through addition flash cards, and while math is said to "be the same in every language" it can still be difficult to translate, however both Lion Ling and Ester did great with the flash cards. We also helped them be able to write down all their personal information, things such as name, address, birthdate and phone number. Finally we started working on money and that where we will pick up on my next visit.
     The most difficult thing about the culture difference is the language barrier, yet on our first visit with the Lings it was amazing to see how hard they worked to get things right. Ester was constantly asking for spellings of words and she wrote many things down. It made working with them so much more enjoyable knowing that they wanted us to be there and wanted to learn. We also made light of the language barrier and  any mistakes that someone would make; just laughing about it constantly and this made it so much less frustrating for everyone involved. To make the experience fun for everyone we also would stop to ask the Lings questions of what certain words meant in their language and they would laugh when we messed up as well. So While they learned what a "vase" is, I was learning that "[ha-coum]" means spoon...and I will have to learn how to spell it too!
     Due to the small group and quiet space there was not much noise in the environment to interfere with communication, again language and interpretation of gestures and facial expressions was they key to our cross-cultural communication. We used interactive strategies- communicating directly with one another as opposed to merely observing. With similar helpful attitudes everyone involved was able to have a positive and productive visit.
     What I learned from this very first visit with the Lings is that cross cultural communication, even when trying to teach a language does not have to be frustrating, instead it can be exciting and a very eye-opening experience. Now that I have met the family and spent time with them, I know how they communicate and how to be mindful of their culture as well as their needs. I can see the signs of interpersonal dialectics and hopefully watch them as they cross over from protective to expressive, autonomous to togetherness and even novelty to predictability. I hope that with each visit I will become closer to the Ling family and also become a more competent communicator.

Blog #1 : Pre-Service

• What are your hopes for the service-learning project?
•  As a sophomore Psychology student at St. Ambrose University, I can only hope that my time as a volunteer at World Relief will impact the lives of the people I spend time with in a positive way. I hope to use this amazing opportunity to give back even a small fraction of what I have been fortunate enough to have been given in my life so far. I am thrilled to be able to meet and just engage in life with refugees from a culture so different from my own, and to be able to lend a helping hand. I hope that out of this journey as a World Relief volunteer I will gain new friendships and a new first-hand perspective on intercultural communication.

 

• What are your assumptions about your service-learning site?
• I assume that the home of the refugee family I will be working with through World Relief will be a peaceful environment, calming and serene as to make the family feel welcome into their new home. I also assume that everyone I meet will share the same enthusiasm as I do about the volunteer work they are doing; that they will be sincerely compassionate about the families in the program.

 

• What do you already know/or assume about the work they do?
• I already know that World Relief takes in refugee families from various countries/cultures and provides them with the shelter and materials they need to begin a peaceful life here in the Quad Cities. As I volunteer I know I will be helping the family with whatever they need to get accustomed to life here. I will be doing things such as help the family learn English, helping them move into their new home and learn the lifestyle, and just spending time with them and bonding with them so they feel comfortable here.

 

• What do you know/or assume about the population they serve
• I know that the refugee families that arrive here have been forced to flee from their homes and some are coming from refugee camps as well. The family I work with may consist of parents and children, young adults or possibly the elderly. I know that many of the refugees that come to the Quad Cities are from Bhutan, Burma, The Democratic Republic of Congo and Iraq. I assume many of them know little English and will experience a major culture shock when they settle into their new homes. However I also assume that they will be eager to start their new life in the QC and will work hard to make the best of their situation.

 

• What connections/interests/passions do you have for this site or the population it serves?
• I have always been eager to learn about and connect with people from cultures other than my own and to hear their stories will be truly enthralling. I think World Relief is an amazing organization that is doing remarkable things for the refugees that have no where else to go. It is a very selfless thing that they do and I am very pleased to be able to be even a small part of it. People fascinate me in all the ways they can be similar and yet so unique, and the compassion they can show to each other regardless of these differences.

How service relates to learning

         Service provides a hands on approach to learning and allows for experiences that can not be found in any classroom or textbook. Service not only lets individuals learn about the particular service they are engaging in but also about themselves. It is the real world application side of education and relates more to life-long learning that a simple assignment for class. Many things can be achieved through service and more often then not is a learning experience for everyone involved. The service project for this Interpersonal Communications course will serve as the main take away of what we learn due to the fact that experiences such as service will impact our lives more than any textbook ever could.